just enough.

He answered them out of a thunder cloud, it says in Psalms, of the time the Israelites spent in the desert. They whined and complained about being stuck in the desert and the Lord sent them bread and meat and answered their cries out of a freaking thundercloud.

This morning I spent a little too long in bed ( we both did ) because for some reason it seemed impossible to wake up. But I absolutely love mornings because there never seems to be enough time for savoring morning light and kisses. But this morning, the boy was almost late to work and as I shoved my running shoes on, nervous about the impending heat of running post- 8 a.m.- I just thought- “maybe I’ll open the door and it will be completely cloudy”. And I opened the door and it was. He answered them out of a thundercloud, my very first thought.

Last night I spent some time with good friends worshipping and talking about Jesus and the way the Israelites in the desert applies so dang much to our own lives. And as I was talking about it, I read a line in Psalm 78 where the Israelites were literally whining about what they didn’t have yet and said, “Can God spread a table in the desert?” And rightfully, it pissed God off because they just kept forgetting how many feasts and tables he had already spread for them in a land where they had nothing. And that’s me. I keep wondering and asking when I might not be in a desert when in reality it doesn’t matter where I am—a table has been spread for me in the middle of the sand and deafening silence (kudos to the one and only Andrew Harrison for that image) that comes with a desert. I’m learning that I live way to much prepping for the next stage of life (house, job, ect.) instead of dwelling in the sweet moment I’m in. And while I’ve always done that and perhaps it doesn’t even seem like a problem anymore- it is completely hindering the way I live out thankfulness, even when I’m incredibly thankful.

One of my sweetest friends just moved back from California and said to me, “if any part of your life isn’t glistening with hope, there is a lie in it”. And dang. That is a powerful thought. Another sweet friend challenged me to start making lists of what I’m thankful for, cherishing the smaller things. It’s something I used to do, but without even telling her that I’ve felt so stuck lately- she knew it in just the way I was speaking and called me out on my need to be thankful.

I think we all need, a reminder to keep hitting the rocks in the desert. The Lord always provides just enough. Today, my just enough was long morningtimes with the greatest guy and runs full of answers from thunderclouds.

I’m becoming conscious of what I should be thankful for in the desert and today I’m thankful for the beauty of having just enough.