take the blame.

Everything is someone else’s fault. Everything is someone else’s problem. How many times a day do we blame person, force, or season for what we’re dealing with? Probably one million, to be exact. At least, I know I do. And I’ve got to change this, not only for me, but because the world needs to change this.

You need to know that sometimes it is your fault.

Again, it is your fault.
I want to shout this daily.
I’m exhausted from blaming others and hearing others blamed.
You didn’t finish your essay? That is not your boyfriend’s fault. It’s yours.
You told your teacher to lose the attitude? That is not your parents’ fault. It’s yours.
You got written up for skipping class eight times this month? That is not your teacher’s fault. It’s yours.
Your child failed a test because they were talking through the entire lesson? That’s not their classmate’s fault, or their teacher’s, or the administration, or their smart phones’. It’s theirs. It’s your kid’s fault. For the love of God, let it be your kid’s fault. They need to start taking their own blame.

I’m two years into teaching and I’m exhausted. The only person whose fault failing kids or failing education or failing schools is mine to bear and that is a lot to bear. Too much actually. I know I said before that I need to check myself and take the blame anyway- but that’s because I put off my own faults because I’m trying to carry so many others. Is that another excuse? Maybe. I’ll pick it back up later, don’t worry.

But I get it. If I’m pessimistic- it’s not the fault of my job. It’s mine.
We get it all tangled, you know. There is a difference in a factor and a fault.

Kids today have some rough lives. I’ve had students (at age twelve!) who have seen family members get shot. I’ve had kids who have been passed back and forth from split parents and step-parents and they are angry at the world and I get it. I really do. In fact, I became a teacher because I get that life sucks sometimes and kids need help. That’s why I signed up for this mess in the first place.

But when we’ve blamed home life and teachers and administration and the Department of Education til we’re blue in the face- we’re missing the lesson that needs to be taught more than any today.

You’re going to have a lot of factors that affect your future. But what you decide to with those factors- the result of them all and your attitude and how you treat your peers and adults that try to help you and whether or not you pick up a book to try to change your circumstances- that’s all you, kid.

There is always an argument. Always. But some of the greatest people in the world have come through the shittiest situations and they CHOSE to rise above it and make something of themselves. They took the blame- and made it into something beautiful.

Your teachers and your friends and your parents can’t make your life what it will be become. They will all be factors in the process. But your outcome? That’s all you.

So to me and you and everyone. Let’s start blaming ourselves for the world around us. Not in a self-doubt kinda way, but in a way that says, “If I don’t recognize that I’m responsible for this mess too- nothing is ever, ever going to change”.

So educational inequality and schools today and pouty attitudes and fights with people and not texting people back and forgetting your best friend’s birthday and the fact that children are hungry and there is so much injustice in the world- that’s my fault.

And I’m willing to take the blame. Are you?